Hipsters Make Better Than Average But Perhaps Slightly Overrated Doughnuts

Indeed the dream of the 90s is alive in Portland.

I found myself in Portland on Monday. Where they make bike sculptures and have to write "No rollerblades" on signs. 


It was an unexpected and unplanned trip. And due to my unorganized nature and my budget being a total of about $20, my accommodations for the night included a lovely bench inside the airport with a scenic view of the tarmac. 

When I arrived at PDX on Sunday night, I slept for a few hours. Or rather, I closed my eyes and wished I had packed my backpack, which was doubling as a pillow, full of marshmallows rather than a metal water bottle, an umbrella, and a banana. 

This is what people who slept on benches
look like while waiting for
trains at 5:30 in the morning.

Once I left the airport my first adventure in the city was at a much hyped place called Voodoo Doughnut. 

Now, I should explain that my doughnut standards are quite high, unlike my standards of where I'm willing to spend the night, which are actually quite low. (Wait that sounds like something my young women's medallion is supposed to remind me not to say. I must have forgotten to wear it. Just kidding, I was referring to my airport-bench-bed.)

located in Glendora, CA

Anyway, regular doughnuts were ruined for me at a young age because of a delicious place named Donut Man(See picture to the right). The Voodoo Doughnuts were scrumptious, but fell just slightly short of my expectations. In their defense, my expectations were impossibly high. 

The view as I ate my Portland cream donut.
Apparently, the official donut of Portland. 

Then I went hiking through the beautifully green Forest Park and saw a slug the size of a tube of toothpaste--not the travel sized toothpaste that is allowed through airport security--no it was the size of a regular Crest minty-fresh tube of toothpaste.

Luckily, slugs don't ruin my appetite because after my hike I had the most delicious tacos I have ever eaten from one of Portland's famous food trucks, while listening to a native Portlander playing the guitar. Street performers are absolutely my favorite thing about cities.

 After lunch, I went to the Lan Su Chinese Garden and took way too many selfies, but that is just one of the drawbacks of going places by yourself.

It wasn't long before I had to head back to the airport for another restful night's sleep on a bench and a flight at six the next morning. Perhaps I would have been able to see more if I hadn't spent so much time at various Starbucks' using the wifi because I like to pretend it is still the early 2000s, so I do not have a smartphone to help me get around. 

Short as it was, it was an adventure. And hopefully now when I watch Portlandia, it will feel less like an inside joke because I will be on the inside too.