Sunday Selfie

            I could pretend I don't have an arrogant side. I could pretend I hate attention or that praise makes me uncomfortable. But I promised to tell the truth so I won't pretend. Today is Selfie Sunday--a cultural movement that made it okay to shout, "Hey, look at me!" So here is my selfie. You already know what I look like, and I don't care if the world knows when I'm having a good hair day.  So instead of a picture it is a self-portrait made of words. 

            Let's get the important things out of the way. I'm sweatier than the average person, and this is why I hate hot weather. My hands are usually cold, I don't like egg rolls, I'm not a touchy person, and I have no idea what color my eyes are.

            I like to watch TV. I'm sure this isn't news to anyone. I instantly like anyone who likes the same shows as me, regardless of how well I know them or if they even remember my name.

            Speaking of remembering names, this is my talent. It seems like the whole world regularly claims to be bad with names. Either everyone is pretending to have a bad memory or I am the only person with this talent.

           

            I can never be a hipster because I have terrible taste in music. Okay, I don't only like terrible music, but.......I get excited when I hear Call Me Maybe. This is a hard thing to admit to the Internet, but what can I say? It makes me want to dance, and I love to dance.  Sidenote: Dancing is a hobby and not a talent. Also I like Macklemore. Okay embarrassing confession time is over. (But Macklemore's so right. Who would pay $50 for a T-shirt? Probably people who aren't cheap. This isn't me.)

            Some people would say I am quiet. They would be right...sometimes. The people who say this probably have not gotten to know me very well. I have been in love with words for as long as I can remember for the way they can be arranged into emotion and ideas and beauty. I could talk for hours on end, but I could spend as much time in silence and enjoy it just as well. There can be nearly as much beauty in the absence of words as there is in their presence.

            I'm aware that a lot of people think selfies are obnoxious. Or maybe it's just the word. (Am I the only one who thinks toddlers must be controlling the slang words of our time?) I do this so that years down the road whoever writes my eulogy will have plenty of material to make it the best eulogy ever written. Or maybe I do it because I am currently unable to walk and I'm very bored, and I hope someone will read this and like it and then come hang out with me. Either way, thanks for listening to me talk about myself.